May screamed out loud and threw the basket of laundry in the air when Peter popped up from behind the couch in her study, her stripes flashing across her skin, eyes snapping orange as her tiger tried to come forward.
“May– stop screaming and oh god stop growling, it’s just me. What do you know about dragon shifters?”
“Peter Benjamin Parker.” A hand pressed dramatically over her heart, May pointed her other finger at him, forcing her shift back so she could talk clearly. “First you apologize for scaring the bejeesus out of me–”
“Sorry, May.”
“– and second, why are you asking about dragon shifters? No one has seen one of those in centuries.”
“Since the Great War?” Peter held up the book so she could see it. “Right? The last official sighting of a dragon shifter was during the Battle for the Valley, right?”
“Yes, the last official sighting was during the Great War, here in the valley, but Peter that was three hundred years ago. Do you think you saw one when you were out hiking? I’ve heard rumours that there is a big shifter in the mountains, but no one’s actually seen anything, which means its probably a bear shifter playing tricks on everyone else.”
“Three hundred years.” Peter sort of collapsed onto the couch, all long legs and arms sprawled around. “Why would someone get stuck in a shift?”
“There are only two reasons why someone is stuck in a shift.” May started picking up the laundry, scowling in his direction. “If they were forced into the shift to save their human half, or if they did something terrible in their shift and gave in to their animal half too much.”
“So if they were in danger?”
“You see it more often with the wilder shifts.” May balled up a pair of socks and tossed them at him. “For example, if you ever scare me like that again, I’ll drop into my tiger shift and good luck getting me out of it. Or–” a severe glare when Peter started laughing at the thought of his Aunt permanently fuzzed out into her tiger. “–or if you were in danger, I’d probably shift as well and not be able to come out of it until I knew you were safe, and probably for a few days after that as well.”
“Alright.” Peter flipped through the book. “So, the bigger the shifter the harder it is to move between forms, right?”
“Right. You’ve seen Avians burst into feathers and fly away at a moments notice, but bears and wolves take longer. My tiger takes longer than your Uncle Ben’s lion did because my shift is bigger.”
“So something– say a dragon? It would take a long time to shift up or down into his form?”
“…sure.” May narrowed her eyes at him. “Why the questions, Peter?”
“No reason.” Peter cleared his throat. “And the other reason for being stuck in a shift? For letting their animal side influence them too much?”
“Yes. But it would have to be something awful.” May clucked her tongue when she saw the stains that hadn’t come out of Peter’s shirt. “Murder, for example. Mostly wolves, sometimes bears. They lose control of their shift and kill another shifter, and alot of times they are forced into a permanent shift.”
“But mentally.” Peter frowned. “Wouldn’t it wreak havoc on a shifters mental state to be stuck in animal form?”
“Of course it does.” May met his eyes steadily. “And when they lose their mind, they are put down. No shifter stuck in their animal half is stable for longer than a few years at most.”
“Right. Well, thank you.” Peter hopped up and over the couch, heading out the door. “I’m going to head out to the woods for a while and–”
“Peter, wait.” May snagged his sleeve. “This obsession with the woods, the mountains, all these questions about dragon shifters. What’s going on?”
“I’m not– I’m not really sure.” Peter admitted. “But I think I’ll have some answers pretty soon.”
Don’t tell your daughter that when a boy is mean or rude to her it’s because he has a crush on her. Don’t teach her that abuse is a sign of love.
My mom always taught me yell or fight back. Boys would be mean and I would yell back. I would get my ass pinched and I would smack them as hard as I could.
Who alway got in trouble? Me.
They would call my mother and she always came in and lectures my teachers and threatened to sue for making her miss work and treating me poorly.
She always taught my brothers to respect women. The only fights my brothers ever got in was defending women from someone else.
The school tried to call my father once instead of my mother on us. He came in in his full preacher outfit (being a preacher and all) and gave them an entire sermon on what would Jesus day of he was called in. They decided dealing with my mom was better.
I think my favorite story of this is when some kid snapped my bra and I turned around, didn’t even think about it, and punched that little motherfucker right in the nose.
So naturally, I end up in the principal’s office, refusing to apologize.
“He shouldn’t have put his hands on me and I wouldn’t have hit him!” That’s the only thing I was saying.
These people had the unfortunate luck of catching my dad at home, instead of my mom. So he comes fucking sauntering in there, like he’s Clint fucking Eastwood in some western movie and looks at me.
“Melissa, did you punch him?”
“Yes.” I said.
“Why?”
“Because he snapped my bra strap.”
And he turns his squinty eyed glare to the principal and says, “You’re telling me my daughter is in trouble because that squirrely looking kid put his hands on her and she chose to defend herself? That’s what you are saying to me.”
“Well, sir-” The man kind of stuttered because my dad is kind of intimidating in the quiet sort of way that kind of whispers in the back of your mind that this person could be dangerous. “Melissa did make it physical.”
“No. That kid put his hands on my daughter. Are you saying my daughter cannot defend herself when some boy decides to put hands on her? Is that what you are teaching my girl?”
I didn’t get suspended that day.
*slow clap for excellent parenting*
This is the parent I want to be omg
I went to a nun school.
The nuns there were like, so rad.
It was a party organized for the end of the school year, and I was helping in the kitchen to prepare stuff with a nun and a bunch of little girls. There was one of the girls’ little brother who was there.
There was a little girl who was carrying a bowl of tomato sauce and was going outside, but the boy was just in front of her and he slammed the door in her face. She dropped the bowl on the floor and got all messy.
So what happened?
The nun went outside, took the boy by the arm, and gave him an epic speech going around the lines of: “Would you treat the Virgin Mary like that, young man?” “Nnnnno…” “Then treat every girl like she’s the Virgin Mary.” Not only the boy had to apologize to the little girl, but he also had to clean up and he was put on kitchen duty for the rest of the day.
Then another day, in catechism class (I was a in a girls’ school, mind you), the nun was there telling us: “If a guy touches you in a way you don’t like, punch him in the face. It’s not a sin against charity. On the contrary, you’re being charitable by showing him he’s sinning by impurity and you’ll save him from going to hell.”
So I was at my desk during class looking like this:
Reblogging for awesome dads and kickass nuns.
If the Catholic church were run by like 90% of the nuns I know, the world would be a much better, much cooler place.
Derek wanted to kiss away all the bad that had ever touched his boyfriend. He eased the shirt off his body, hands running beneath Seth’s to run over his abdomen and up to take it off and toss it aside. “Is there a…particular way you want me?” he asked softly, kissing along Seth’s collarbone.
Seth shivered. “I… as much as I hate admitting this, I don’t think I’m ready for uh… my butt to be explored that way but maybe we can ease me into that at some point?” He questioned, biting his lip.
Derek nodded, leaning to kiss him again. “Just tell me what you want, and I’ll give it to you.” he promised quietly, almost purring as he ran his hand over his lover’s body. “I swear.”
“Yes that is my name,” she smiled softly at him tgen watched him unwrap his hands, “Why do you not sleep often if you dont mind my asking Steve?” His question was a fsir one, “Dreams of my soon to be former husband.”
Steve shrugged. “I was comatose for almost seventy years, kind of hard to sleep after all that time.” Nightmares didn’t help, but Steve didn’t talk about that. Hearing her comment, he arched a brow, watching her. “I assume you mean Loki?”
“I can relate to that feeling,” she had been cursed with the same long sleep as Oden when Loki had changed into his darker self. When he asked about Loki she tried to keep her composure, “Yes.” The brother had once been the man of her dreams and kindhearted, now he was a monster that she had suffered too long over.
“What do you normally do to fill this time Steve?”
Steve hummed a little, nodding. He watched her for a moment. “It varies. Sometimes I workout, sometimes I read.” He left out other activities, like drawing or watching old movies. He was quiet for a long moment. “Thor tells me Loki wasn’t always so dark.” he mused. “I take it you can vouch to those claims?”
Note: Inspired (and some based on) Simple Plan’s “Jet Lag” featuring Natasha Bedingfield, here are some of the sentence starters that could be applicable for any muses who are in separate timezone and/or have a long distance relationship. Feel free to change pronounce or any sentence structure according to your muses!
“What time is it where you are?”
“Five more days and I’ll be home.”
“I miss you more than anything.”
“Trying to figure out the timezone is making me crazy!”
“I don’t even wanna be in this town.”
“I’m back at home but you feel so far.”
“I wake up to your sunset, and it’s driving me mad.”
“I was waiting for the phone to ring.”
“I miss you so bad.”
“It’s getting lonely feeling upside down.”
“You say good morning, when it’s midnight.”
“Going out of my head, alone in this bed.”
“My heart is jet-lagged.”
“I keep your picture in my car.”
“I hate the thought of you alone.”
“I’ve been keeping busy all the time, just to try to keep you off my mind.”
“I wanna share your horizon and see the same sun rising.”
“Can we turn the hour hand back to when you were holding me?”
“You’re not gonna pick me at the airport this Friday?”
“We have to do the airport-hug thing when you come to pick me up!”
“I’m only skype-ing because my [dog/cat/any pets] missed you.”
“You’re really not coming back this weekend?”
“It’s great here! It’s just… there’s no you.”
“God, I wish you’re here so you can see this view.”
“If I’d known, I would’ve asked you to come with me.”
“You know it’s business, [Name]. But I’ll be back soon, okay?”
“You always say that, but I’d only see you for a day or two until you have to fly out again.”
“Do you really have to go?”
“Can’t you stay with me — just for a few more days?”
“Stop texting me to come home, you’re hours away!”
“Remember when we went to that cafe before you left? We had a good night, huh?”
“Stop pouting, you’re gonna make me miss you more!”
“…oh, you’re busy? No, it’s okay. I’m sorry I called you so late. I forgot you’re like, three hours [earlier/later] than I am.”
“Hey, why are you crying? Don’t cry. I’m not there to hold you.”
“God, I wish I hadn’t left.”
“It’s… taking longer than we’ve expected. I’m sorry.”
“If the flight’s delaying one more time, I’m finding a boat or a train to take me to you.”
“I don’t want you over this stupid phone. I want you here.”
“You’re going away again?”
“Don’t forget your plane ticket or else I’ll burn it by the time you look the other way again.”
“You know I don’t want you to go.”
“Look, you can do that here, can’t you? Do you really have to leave?”
“I’m counting the days until I’ll see you again.”
“When you come back, we’re gonna do bunch of stuff together.”
“Can you buy me a souvenir while you’re there?”
“Come back home safe.”
“Can you please come back, please? I know you’re hours away, but I just want you here for one minute. That’s all I’m asking. One minute.”
“I’ve been learning new stuff when you’re away.”
“I met this person last week. They don’t know I’m with you.”
“You know what, just fucking go.”
“Don’t you like staying here with me?”
“You… didn’t tell me it was that far away.”
“I saw something today that reminded me of you.”
“Stop touching the screen, I’m not there, you idiot.”
“You’ll come back home, right?”
“Your flight leave at 7am, right? I’ll put an alarm for you.”
“I don’t wanna sleep ‘cause I’m gonna miss you.”
“I’ll be back before you know it, I promise.”
“I know you have this whole life there, but can’t you spare just one minute talking to your own [mother/father/sister/best friend/boyfriend/girlfriend]?”
“Wherever you are, as long as we’re under the same sky, we’re not that far.”
“Whatever happens tomorrow, we’d at least have today.”
“Before I go, I need you to know that I love you.”
themusechronicles 