Alec nodded in agreement. The last few days really had been rough, so being here with Jace was nice. Better than nice, it was amazing. He felt relaxed already. “On top of me,” Alec breathed out as he moved to lay down instead. “All over m-me,” he stuttered out as he lifted his hips. Jace’s touch was teasing and he had a feeling that the blonde knew it. “Fuck, Jace. I need you.” And he was never really this vocal, but it had been a long time since they’d had each other. He rested his hands at Jace’s hips as he said, “Please don’t hold back tonight. I want whatever you’re able to give. And I hope you let me help you along too.”

Blonde bangs fell into his face as he sat up better, moving to straddle over his over before leaning in to kiss him. “I need you too, Alec. Always. Until my last breath.” It was words that anyone would misinterpret as just their parabatai bond, but both of them knew it was so much deeper. He tilted his head, kissing along Alec’s jawline and to his neck. “Are you sure, baby? I left a few bruises last time I went wild.”

“Do you even have to ask?” Alec continued a slow trail along Jace’s neck. If he could mark him he would, but then he knew that Jace wouldn’t really like having to cover up those spots. He supposed Jace could say he was with someone else, but then Alec wouldn’t like hearing that, so that would get them nowhere. “You locked the door, right?” He asked as he parted enough to look at him. Jace’s hands on his thighs had him itching to get closer to him, but he wanted to make sure that the chance of being caught together was slim. If anyone came by, they would likely think Jace wasn’t there or asleep. “Because we might do something indecent and I doubt anyone would want to walk in on this.”

Jace smiled and leaned up to kiss Alec. “I don’t have to, but I will anyway.” he answered. He always wanted to make sure it was what Alec wanted, something that eased the usual self doubt he hid from everyone but his parabatai. “Of course I locked the door, just in case you wanted to stay tonight. The last few days have been rough.” he explained, giving a grin. “How do you want me, baby?” he asked, one hand dipping between Alec’s legs to brush his fingers along his length.

bowstrung

“You’re quite a bit better at it than me most times. I guess that makes us a good match too.” Alec’s eyes briefly closed as he felt Jace’a lips along his jaw, he resisted the urge to moan as this was more of an important moment than that. At least they were willing to fight for each other, he thought. If they weren’t then this would have never worked out and they’d made it this far, hasn’t they? Sometimes he bought that Isabelle knew what they were doing, but she didn’t scold them nor had she told anyone and if he trusted anyone with this, it would be her. “Okay,” Alec agreed with a nod. “We’ll be alright.” They had to be, for both of their sake. A moan did escape him then and he curled closer to Jace. “Mmm, me to…love you,” he breathed against his mouth. His hand trailed up Jace’s stomach as he felt the muscles there beneath his shirt. Today was one of those days that he couldn’t believe Jace was his. Unable to resist, Alec moved to straddle Jace as he deepened the kiss. If Jace wanted him to stop, he was always welcome to tell him to do so. “Mine,” he murmured as he trailed his mouth along Jace’s neck.

Jace gave a little smile. “Have to seem confident in front of others somehow, right?” he mused, content to just lay, but he loved the feel of Alec’s body against him, too. Hearing the moan, he grinned and pulled Alec closer, head canting to one side so Alec had better access to his neck. “Only yours.” he swore, hands ghosting along Alec’s thighs. “Gonna stay the night?” he asked. “It’s been a while.” He really was glad their rooms were close enough that they could stay in each other’s rooms, and it seemed like it was something they both needed.

Alec

Alec felt himself relax at those words. He should have known that Jace would say something to make him feel better and he was glad of it. He closed his eyes as he leaned into Jace’s touch. “You know the right things to say, don’t you?” He opened his eyes to look at him as a smile curled up his lips. One of his hands reached out to curl around Jace’s shirt and pull him just the tiniest bit closer, or at least he felt like he’d done that. “No, never. I’m here with you, for you; always.” Alec kissed him back tenderly as his other hand reached up to caress Jace’s face. “You’ve already said enough, Jace. And I’m sorry I’m being so insecure. It’s just…I’ve never really had anything this good, something that I truly wanted and I don’t want it all to slip away.” And if anyone found out, then he would fight. He wouldn’t let the Clave or their parents or anyone pull them away. “I will fight for you, Jace. I will always be by your side. You don’t have to fear losing me either. I’m here to stay and I love you.” Alec leaned in again, mouth just barely kissing at the corner of Jace’s. “You are my sun and moon,” he whispered. “My sky and stars.” And his whole world, Alec thought. His thumb brushed over a cheek and he kissed him fully on the mouth then. He hoped to convey all the feelings that he felt for Jace in that one kiss.

Jace smiled as he felt Alec relax, leaning to steal another kiss. “I try to. You know I’m not the best with words and feelings.” He laughed softly and adjusted closer as Alec tugged at his shirt, tilting his head to kiss at Alec’s jaw. Sometimes he wished things had been different, maybe if they were mundane it would be easier, but he didn’t regret choosing Alec for a moment. “Always us.” he promised, nodding as he leaned into the hand on his cheek. He wished he could just take away every doubt his boyfriend had, but in their line of work it was hard. “No one is taking me anywhere without a fight, anyway.” The confident grin on Jace’s lips was also loving and he moved to lay on his side so he could lay an arm over Alec’s waist. “We’ll fight anything that ever happens, together. Okay? No matter what, we’re gonna fight for each other.” he promised, hand brushing up Alec’s chest so he could run his hand through dark hair. “I love you, too.” Bicolored eyes closed as he was kissed, tugging Alec closer and nipping at his lower lip gently. “I love you so much.”

Don’t Let Go | bowstrung

Alec [ @bowstrung ]

“If someone did ask questions, what would you tell them?” Alec wondered if he would say he wasn’t seeing anyone. He wished more than anything that they didn’t have to hide, but it was the truth of their lives. “I can’t help it, Jace. Our relationship is very complicated. More complicated than most complicated relationships and I can’t help but worry that you’ll get bored of me or want to be in public with someone that you don’t have to hide with.” He ducked his head as he rambled, feeling guilt for feeling these things. Alec knew that he had no reason really to doubt their relationship, but it was something that he did. He looked up quickly at him then when he spoke and gave him an offended sort of look. “Why would I want anyone else? You’re all I’ve ever wanted. You’re the only person who’s every truly understood me. Though don’t tell Isabelle that, she might be upset. But it’s true. I do love you Jace, so much. You’re the perfect man for me too. I just…wish that our situation was different, is all.” Maybe one day it would be, but that wouldn’t be for a very long time. “I’m sorry, I’ll try not to think on it anymore.”

Jace tilted his head. “I would say I have someone special and that’s all they need to know.” he said honestly. “I know that this…us…I know it’s complicated. It’s risky and I would rather have to hide than never know what it’s like to love you.” he explained. He gave a little laugh, running his fingers through Alec’s hair. “I’m not going anywhere, and you clearly aren’t gong anywhere. So obviously, we’re always going to have each other, and no one is going to change that.” he replied, leaning to brush his lips against the other man’s. “Tell me what to do to make those thoughts go away, Alec.”